I have not written anything in two years simply because we had switched to dial-up. Yeah, I know right? Ugh! So three days ago we switched to Hughes net, which is way way faster and I love it. Now I can finally watch videos and post blogs without it taking forever.
I have not written anything in a long time. Writing has always been a great passion of mine because I am able to get my feelings and emotions out on paper because paper does not judge me of who I am.
The past two years have been wonderful. I have the most amazing boyfriend who has stood by me through thick and thin and who I can't imagine living my life without. He has a wonderful family who claim me as their own and I love that. He has two of the most sweetest grandmother's who treat me like I am their granddaughter and I would do absolutely anything in the world for them. His mom is just an amazing woman. She works hard and strives to do her best. She has been a mother to me too and took me in when I felt that I had nobody. I will always be grateful to her.
I can't leave out Ashley, who I have known for 11 years but we have only been friends since the 12th grade. We got close right there at the end towards graduation and then did not see each other for a few years and finally met up and started hanging out again. I will always be grateful to Ashley and Lanett because they helped me and Derek find each other when I did not think it was possible, nor did I believe in hook ups. I believe in it now :]
Josh is his little brother who is a great kid. He is probably the most important person in Derek's life and therefore I do everything I can in helping out with him because if something is important to Derek, it is important to me. I have been a part of this family long enough that they all feel like relatives to me.
Just because someone is blood related to you does not make them family. A family is a group of people who make you a priority in their life. The Lemacks/Outen family has shown me what a true family is all about and I am proud to have them be a part of my life.
I am still working on the college thing. I have been going for five years! I often get discouraged and feel like giving up when I hit rock bottom but I always get back up. If I had no bills, I would go full-time and take at the most four classes per semester. Right now it is impossible to do that having to work enough hours to make a good paycheck for the following week to pay a car payment and high cell phone bill. Let's not forget the insurance. I honestly do not know what I would do if my parents made me pay rent. We have our ups and downs but I am very grateful to them for understanding my situation. If I had a good job making good money, I would pay my parents half of everything because it is the right thing to do. This also frustrates me because I want to be able to help out but I CAN'T! Yesterday I went to town thinking that I was going to be able to pay for a CNA class that I so desperately wanted to take in Sumter next month and could not get a student loan from the school. I drove home crying. All I want to do is to better myself and it seems like I always get knocked down when I am out here trying. I do not want to be stuck at CVS for the rest of my life dealing with rude customers and running back and forth from the register to the aisle's and vise versa and also having to deal with my hours getting cut back. I work hard when I am scheduled to work and I thought that showing your boss how hard you work was a plus but it has shown nothing but negativity. I love the people that I work with there and I do not have a problem at all with anyone, not even the boss. I just want hours that I rightfully deserve. It is the first place that I have ever worked that I actually like and get along with people who act like adults. I didn't get that working in the grocery stores. I will NEVER go back to a grocery store, EVER!
Last night, I applied at an elderly resident home in hopes that they will be calling me very soon. I know it will be something that I will enjoy because I have been thinking a lot lately about wanting to help the elderly. Some of them feel alone and they need love and support and I want to be one of the people who will be there for them and show them that I care. I want to get attached. It will benefit me in many ways, not just money wise. I am not going into nursing for the money, although it does pay good and is a stable profession. Ever since I was in 5k I have wanted to be a nurse. I almost died as a baby with Spinal Meningitis and my peditrition saved my life. I can't tell anyone how many times I heard that story growing up but ever since I was old enough to understand that I could have died, I wanted to be a nurse to help other people the way that Dr. Joseph helped save me. Helping people is my passion along with writing and my other talents.
Last but not least, I want a good career because I want a family of my own. I have always dreamed of having my own family. I have an amazing man in my life who doesn't rush me into anything as I don't try to rush him. We are content with dating right now but we both hope to be more one day. I want to play it smart though. I want my career first, then marriage, then children. I'm not trying to hate on anyone who has not done things in order, but I know for myself that I want things to happen in order because I know that right now I can barely take care of myself, much less a child who will need everything that I can't provide for them at this present time. I love babies but I want to be 100% ready. I love how I am around Derek's family and they ask us when we are going to have a baby and I feel my face turn 10 shades of Red. Lol. It is somewhat embarrasing, but natural for people to ask since we have been together forever. There is nobody else I want out there. Derek is the one no doubt. I can't wait to see what our future holds :]
I have not written anything in a long time. Writing has always been a great passion of mine because I am able to get my feelings and emotions out on paper because paper does not judge me of who I am.
The past two years have been wonderful. I have the most amazing boyfriend who has stood by me through thick and thin and who I can't imagine living my life without. He has a wonderful family who claim me as their own and I love that. He has two of the most sweetest grandmother's who treat me like I am their granddaughter and I would do absolutely anything in the world for them. His mom is just an amazing woman. She works hard and strives to do her best. She has been a mother to me too and took me in when I felt that I had nobody. I will always be grateful to her.
I can't leave out Ashley, who I have known for 11 years but we have only been friends since the 12th grade. We got close right there at the end towards graduation and then did not see each other for a few years and finally met up and started hanging out again. I will always be grateful to Ashley and Lanett because they helped me and Derek find each other when I did not think it was possible, nor did I believe in hook ups. I believe in it now :]
Josh is his little brother who is a great kid. He is probably the most important person in Derek's life and therefore I do everything I can in helping out with him because if something is important to Derek, it is important to me. I have been a part of this family long enough that they all feel like relatives to me.
Just because someone is blood related to you does not make them family. A family is a group of people who make you a priority in their life. The Lemacks/Outen family has shown me what a true family is all about and I am proud to have them be a part of my life.
I am still working on the college thing. I have been going for five years! I often get discouraged and feel like giving up when I hit rock bottom but I always get back up. If I had no bills, I would go full-time and take at the most four classes per semester. Right now it is impossible to do that having to work enough hours to make a good paycheck for the following week to pay a car payment and high cell phone bill. Let's not forget the insurance. I honestly do not know what I would do if my parents made me pay rent. We have our ups and downs but I am very grateful to them for understanding my situation. If I had a good job making good money, I would pay my parents half of everything because it is the right thing to do. This also frustrates me because I want to be able to help out but I CAN'T! Yesterday I went to town thinking that I was going to be able to pay for a CNA class that I so desperately wanted to take in Sumter next month and could not get a student loan from the school. I drove home crying. All I want to do is to better myself and it seems like I always get knocked down when I am out here trying. I do not want to be stuck at CVS for the rest of my life dealing with rude customers and running back and forth from the register to the aisle's and vise versa and also having to deal with my hours getting cut back. I work hard when I am scheduled to work and I thought that showing your boss how hard you work was a plus but it has shown nothing but negativity. I love the people that I work with there and I do not have a problem at all with anyone, not even the boss. I just want hours that I rightfully deserve. It is the first place that I have ever worked that I actually like and get along with people who act like adults. I didn't get that working in the grocery stores. I will NEVER go back to a grocery store, EVER!
Last night, I applied at an elderly resident home in hopes that they will be calling me very soon. I know it will be something that I will enjoy because I have been thinking a lot lately about wanting to help the elderly. Some of them feel alone and they need love and support and I want to be one of the people who will be there for them and show them that I care. I want to get attached. It will benefit me in many ways, not just money wise. I am not going into nursing for the money, although it does pay good and is a stable profession. Ever since I was in 5k I have wanted to be a nurse. I almost died as a baby with Spinal Meningitis and my peditrition saved my life. I can't tell anyone how many times I heard that story growing up but ever since I was old enough to understand that I could have died, I wanted to be a nurse to help other people the way that Dr. Joseph helped save me. Helping people is my passion along with writing and my other talents.
Last but not least, I want a good career because I want a family of my own. I have always dreamed of having my own family. I have an amazing man in my life who doesn't rush me into anything as I don't try to rush him. We are content with dating right now but we both hope to be more one day. I want to play it smart though. I want my career first, then marriage, then children. I'm not trying to hate on anyone who has not done things in order, but I know for myself that I want things to happen in order because I know that right now I can barely take care of myself, much less a child who will need everything that I can't provide for them at this present time. I love babies but I want to be 100% ready. I love how I am around Derek's family and they ask us when we are going to have a baby and I feel my face turn 10 shades of Red. Lol. It is somewhat embarrasing, but natural for people to ask since we have been together forever. There is nobody else I want out there. Derek is the one no doubt. I can't wait to see what our future holds :]
No comments:
Post a Comment